Saturday, March 20, 2010

Lisa's Mum talks wound management

Most followers of this blog will be familiar with Lisa's Mum through her insightful Tour de France commentary (a valuable, if unobstrusive member of the SBS commentary team). Mum has been enjoying the off-season and is extremely excited about an impending trip to Europe this year, as she finds her commentary noticably improves when she is able to attend races in person. In preparation for her trip, Mum has been brushing up on her first aid skills.

Now, let's get one thing straight here- Lisa's Mum is not a doctor. However, as she is a Mum she is automatically also a nurse and is therefore more than qualified to talk about the treatment of injuries and abrasions. (Mum is also lecturing in Wound Management 101 at The University of West Glenelg, you can catch her for book signings afterwards or you can also sign up for her WEA courses, Crocheting For Beginners and Joining The Darning Revolution)

Mum has kindly taken time out from her busy schedule to impart some wisdom on first aid. So here it is, Lisa's Mum's guide to wound management:

  1. Make sure you are always equipped with a first aid kit when you go riding. Mum likes to pack some essentials, like betadine, saline scrubs, melolin and at least 3x10ft of gauze on her bike, generally in the panniers (under the reflective flag). It does make the bike a bit harder to ride but that is the price of preparedness. Mum also likes to pack zip ties to fix to the top of her helmet in the springtime because she finds them every effective in holding her marshmallows and cocktail frankfurts in place when out for a longer ride.

  2. Mum loves conversations with other people about dressings. She finds you can get to know a person intimately by their choice of dressing. For example, a person who favours putting second skin straight onto a raw graze (by day 2 the dressing is carrying enough fluid to breach water restrictions) is generally the sort of person who loved popping zits as a teenager and spends their evenings searching for ingrown hairs on their legs.

  3. Kissing a wound better has valuable anti-bacterial properties but not if the kisser is your Uncle Bill whose last run-in with a mouthwash was when he fell off the wagon in 1974.

  4. Make sure you tailor the dressing to suit the injury. Some dressings have stronger healing properties than others and are therefore better suited to more serious injuries. Mum calls this the Healing Zen Quotient. For example, Wiggles bandaids have a higher Healing Zen Quotient than Simpsons bandaids, but are lower than Mr Men. Dinosaur bandaids are ok but not as good as Barbie. If you get a Wiggles bandaid with the ORIGINAL blue Wiggle on it, you can practically cure cancer.

  5. Anxiety can slow the healing process. For example, wanting to punch someone in the head everytime you get asked, 'So, did you fall off your bike?' is not good for healing zen. Actually punching someone in the head, however, can definitely help, particularly if they are annoying.

4 comments:

  1. Got track mes down some of those orginal blue Wiggles band aids! :D

    ReplyDelete
  2. Highly entertaining blog Lisa! Will be adding this to the Favs!

    ReplyDelete
  3. Lisa, I don't know you but f@$k that's some FUNNY sh!t!!!!

    ReplyDelete